New Year, Old You: How to Find Yourself

In 2020, I got to go to my sister-in-law’s wedding. At the reception, as people were finishing up their dinner and cake, the DJ got the music going and everyone made their way to the dance floor. I grabbed my 5-year-old son’s hand, walked onto the floor, and started to twirl him around. We danced and danced and danced. I felt a spark of joy that I hadn’t felt in years and thought, There you are. You love to dance. It was like finding a part of me that had been missing for a long time.

Life is so busy that it can often feel more like business than life. In the day-to-day grind of fixing lunches and changing diapers and running from errands to meetings to appointments, it’s easy to wonder, Where am I? Who am I? We lose ourselves in our own lives and even forget simple things—like how much we love to dance.

If you’re feeling the same way I am, you’re tired of the rush, the exhaustion, and the jam-packed calendar. You’re missing the person you used to be before life got so stinking busy. And the truth is, we can rediscover the passion, the joy and the fun that makes us feel alive.

You aren’t going to find yourself by accident, so here are two important truths that will help you reconnect with who you are in 2021:

To find yourself, you must choose to pause and reset. Our lives are so busy that we need to intentionally schedule time to be still and reflect. Translation: Put it on the calendar. We both know that if it’s not on the calendar, it’s not going to happen. Carve out space for yourself to be still, to journal and think and dream. Listen to the questions your heart is asking and commit to rediscovering who you are this year.

Taking the time to find yourself is not selfish or wrong. In fact, it’s one of the best gifts you can give your family or your friends. If you’re living fully alive, with the joy and fun and spark of being you, you’ll be able to be a better sister, brother, friend, wife, husband, mom, dad, employee—you get it. By taking care of yourself, you’re taking care of others, too.

No matter what’s headed our way this year, I hope this is the year you rediscover who you are and find your spark again!